The girl with the ugly sweater
by snipsa
Summary: Crackfic! Shay has a mini meltdown after seeing a face from her past at the hospital. AU! Crossover of sorts. Lots of liberties taken with Shay's past. One-shot.


**The girl with the ugly sweater**

**Summary: Crackfic! Shay has a mini meltdown after seeing a face from her past at the hospital. AU! Crossover of sorts. Lots of liberties taken with Shay's past.**

**Warnings: AU! - Lots of liberties are taken with Shay's past. Crackfic! Of sorts. Multiple crossover, but everything is explained – in fact no names are mentioned, could be seen as simple coincidence.**

"Shay! Talk to me girl! What's going on? You haven't been yourself since we stopped at County General this afternoon. In fact it looked like you had seen a ghost!" Gabriela Dawson looked her best friend up and down, trying to gauge her reaction to her observations. She had dragged her friend to the bar after their shift ended, to force her to open up, even if it took three bottles of wine to get the full story out of her.

Leslie Shay looked back at her friend, a picture of shame and sadness painted across her features. "I honestly think I did." Her reply was soft and timid. "I saw a part of my past that I have tried to forget for more than a decade."

Seeing that her friend would need some liquid courage to continue her confession, Dawson poured them two large glasses of Chardonnay, all the while guiding Shay towards a corner booth. Gabby tried to steer her friend back to the topic at hand. "More than a decade ago, does that mean it happened during your high school years or during your time at college?"

Shay took a large gulp from her coupe, before starting her story. "It was during my senior year of high school. You have to understand something about me at that time Gabby... I was so confused about my sexual orientation, I could not even look at another girl without the fear of unwanted feelings rearing their ugly heads! This led to me being the biggest bitch in our school. There was one girl, specifically, that I could not stand! Preacher's daughter, goody-two-shoes, all around pain in the ass. God, I hated her for the longest time!"

"I can still remember some of the things I told her, the names I called her, both to her face and behind her back. It only became worse when the guy I wanted to like, but who was really just my beard of the week, started dating her. That's when I started to truly despise her! I did the worst things possible. Doctored photos, spread lies about her virginity, tried to kiss her boyfriend, anything I could, just to keep my true feelings from showing! And it wasn't even that I was afraid that I would fall for her, she was clearly not my type! I was just so afraid that she could actually be a friend, this girl that I had known most of my life, and whose life I had made hell for most of that time, could have been my friend. I hated her for that almost as much as I hated myself for it!"

When Shay lapsed into an uncomfortable silence Gabriela took it upon herself to fill the void. "Have you spoken to her recently? You're not the same person you were back then, you could still be her friend. Was it her that you saw at County today?" Unfortunately that was clearly the wrong line of questioning as tears formed in the corners of Shay's eyes. Taking a deep breath Shay spoke, the words were so soft Gabby had to lean in closer to hear what was being said. "No, I haven't spoken to her recently, I can never speak to her again. It wasn't her that I saw. It was my old beard. Her widower... That girl died the summer after our graduation. Leukaemia. I don't think I would have been friends with you, if it had not been for her. After she died, I realized that I hated the person I was becoming, I accepted my sexuality, started to hang out with others of the female species, and the rest is history.

"All it took for me to become a whole person, with true friends, true loves and a job I love, was for another human being to not have the chance to experience those things any more. What type of terrible person am I? I pushed back all of these feelings for the longest time. I think I would still not have admitted to it, had I not seen him there today. He's a Doctor now, took after his dad. I always thought he would go the rocker route, or maybe the spy route – he had that vibe about him, but he ended up going to Medical School straight after her death. Think he had his own demons to fight."

"Heard he lost both legs in a freak truck accident a few years ago. Don't know how he's still standing to be honest. Think I would have just laid myself down and never got up again after all the shit that's been piled on him. He just gets back up, with that stupid smile on his face and guitar in his hands. I think I may hate him too."

With those final words, Shay refilled their glasses, and raised hers in a soft toast – "To the girl with the ugly sweater and beautiful soul. You changed my life." 

**Author's note**

_**Okay, don't know where to start with this, I haven't written fanfic in over three years, however the idea for this little ficlet came after I re-watched one of my biggest early 2000's guilty pleasure movies for the first time in over a decade - "A walk to remember" and recognised Shay as the "antagonist" in the movie. This plot bunny just sprung from that. I realize it doesn't add anything of substance to the current storyline, but I couldn't get the bunny to leave my brain.**_

_**Fic not beta'd, and English is not my first language, so please forgive any spelling and grammar mistakes you may have noticed, but feel free to point them out in a review.**_


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